Monthly Archives: February 2010

Deadline

I need to know by February 12 if you plan to take my Hypnobabies class.  This series begins Feb. 19 and will last six consecutive Fridays from 6pm-9pm.

Please email me for more information:  j_byers [at] bellsouth [dot] net.

Words from My 4 Year Old

Bird-watching in the snow

I kept a notepad near me so I could catch some of her words today. 

  • “I’m the mommy.”
  • “You can never eat again.  NEVER.”
  • “Feed Cedar to the lions.”
  • “I broke mine ankle.  All the bones came out.  But I put them back in.”
  • “You’re kidding me?  Blackbird has the letter ‘C’ in it?  Are you sure?”
  • “I need one of those things what make little things bigger.”  (a microscope)
  • “You forgot to sweep under the rug yesterday.  Look at that dirt!  Do it now.”
  • “You’re never gonna pet Jude again.  NEVER.”
  • “I’m going to Heaven first.  You don’t get to go to Heaven first.  I do.  Hmph.”
  • “Put Cedar out in the grass.”
  • “You stink.  Cedar put her stinky on you.”
  • “You go in the kitchen.  I’ll watch over Cedar.”  (yeah right!)

Are you seeing any trends? 

But my favorite:

“Mom, you’re the bestest mommy in the whole wide world.”  (Ok, that was after I made hot chocolate and popcorn).

Congratulations, You’re Pregnant and…

You have choices:

1)  You can choose the status quo:  do what your doctor says, show up at the hospital when your labor begins (or more likely your induction), vaccinate according to the CDC schedule, etc. 

or

2)  Scramble to become an astute researcher in a very short while:  learn to discern myth from reality, question the status quo, wonder where the boundaries of your new power as parent begin and end.

And that myth from reality part is tough even for doctors!  I was at a birth during which the mom opted for an epidural.  The anesthesiologist said, “There is no truth to the myth that epidurals slow down labor.”  No less than 10 minutes after he left the room, the OB came in and said, “Now, we know that epidurals often slow labor…” 

Frankly, choice 1 comes with less stress.  Choosing this path is not indicative of your parenting merit or your character.  It is a choice.  I’ve had clients who made this choice.  They hire a doula to guard their informed consent or provide need-to-know info on the spot. 

Choice 2 requires quite a bit of work.  And if you’ve not been thinking much about birth or the politics/litigation/trends of the American birth scene, it can feel overwhelming to tackle such a monster during pregnancy. 

To me, choosing the second path has the benefit of springboarding you into parenting.  Most things in parenting are not cut and dry.  There are hard choices to make and for the first time, perhaps, you’re making big choices for another human being.  Pregnancy is a wonderful time to begin finding your mama or papa voice. 

Noelle and Zach are doing this.  And not just about their birth choices.  Before they became pregnant, they were already thinking through questions of vaccinations. 

Eek…the dreaded vaccination question.  CDC schedule, alternate schedule, no schedule?  Aluminum, mercury, pertussis, oh my!

Ha!  If there is one area I refuse to give advice, it is vaccinations.  There is risk on both sides.  And I believe only the parent has the right to decide which risk to take:  possible disease or possible side-effect. 

Ah but Noelle and Zach are in a unique position.  They not only get to decide about the usual shots (around 20 before the age of 6 months), they also get to decide about shots like japanese encephalitis and rabies.  See, these cats will be moving to a developing country when their wee one is around 5 or 6 months.  Shhh…don’t tell them I said this but I’m very glad I’m not in their shoes when it comes to making decisions about those vaccines!   

Pregnancy is a beautiful time to try out our courage,  our strength, and our intuition.  Pregnancy is a beautiful time to begin parenting.