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Killer Bees and Underwater Breastfeeding

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Did you hear about the one where the woman was nursing her baby while sitting on the pool steps? 

The story goes that she got stung by something on her shoulder and she freaked.  She dunked herself to get rid of the horrible monster attacking her.  She completely forgot about the baby until she re-emerged.  Her husband yells, “the baby!”  She looks down to find the baby still latched on.  Cedar, er, the baby, goes back to her nursing without any fuss. 

Ah, but the mother can’t let it go. 

Expecting to find a huge swollen sting, she sheepishly discovers a tiny red mark from what was probably a wee little sweat bee. 

The mother is troubled by her complete absorption in self-preservation.  For a moment, she truly forgot about the babe in arms.  She’s been imagining all sorts of scenes (concentration camps, hostage situations, famines) and wondering if she would sacrifice her children to save herself.

Her sister, the counselor, helpfully suggested that it is like the rule on planes to place the oxygen mask on you before the child.  Another friend praised her for saving the baby from the killer bee.  Her husband…well, I won’t mention what he says.

The mother is relieved that it was a private pool with no witnesses.

4 responses »

  1. Ahhh. At least you’re able to share your parenting experiences to make the rest of us feel normal. Not that I’ve been stung by a bee recently. 🙂

  2. I am terrified of bees and probably would’ve done something similar–possibly after just hearing a bee buzz by my ear. It’s like a reflex, can’t help it. So cute that Cedar didn’t even break her latch! We’ve joked that maybe Ivey’s tolerance for water in her face is partly due to her being born in the water.

  3. As much as we’d like it to be, Motherhood isn’t a superpower. Even it can’t overcome basic biological instincts that have been ingrained in our DNA for a few million or so. Just because you’re holding a baby doesn’t mean you can shut down that survival part of your brain. If anything, it just amplifies our responses. You WERE saving her from killer bees, scientifically speaking 🙂

  4. I’m pretty allergic to bees and have to carry Benedryl with me everywhere. I admit that I have definitely put myself first when there are bees around, children or no, but if something happens to ME then the babes are toast, too! You save yourself, you can save them.


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