I added a new page.
I’ve been trying to remember all my blooper moments. Email me if you remember something funny from your class or your birth.
Category Archives: Birth
After the cesarean
I hear:
- Everybody tells me I should just be thankful I have a healthy baby.
- I wish I hadn’t taken a single class or read any books. I wish I hadn’t known so much. Then I wouldn’t care.
- Could I have made different choices?
- Would this have happened with a different provider? Different place?
- Is there something wrong with my body?
- What if [fill in the blank]?
A couple of times a month, I get emails from women who have had cesareans –usually for their first baby. Some have just given birth. Some gave birth years ago and contemplate pregnancy. Some are soon to birth again. They tell me their stories. And they ask their questions. I do not have answers. I am not qualified. But I’m the one hearing the questions and the grief from these mamas who are healing from their cesarean births.
The mindful women, the ones who educate themselves about birth, the ones who make good choices during their pregnancy–these women, after having a cesarean birth, often mourn.
And there is little space in our culture for mourning such an experience. Because, after all, you had a good outcome; a healthy baby. Why should you feel sad or disappointed? It is challenging to find the language to express these feelings. Many women lose faith in their body. Some lose faith in the medical system. Some get angry. Some give up.
Perhaps the first thing to do is to begin processing these feelings. Surround yourself with stories of vaginal births after cesarean (VBAC). Watch VBAC clips on youtube. Create space to mourn and to heal through writing, art, or ritual.
And then, when your spirit is renewed, find the research and information to plan your next birth.
ICAN is a good place to begin. Find your local chapter and reach out to these supportive women. The Greenville group is full of resources and incredible stories.
I’d love to hear from you on this one. Thoughts?
I heart my perineum
First, I’m not a midwife and this list is not exhaustive. I’m often asked by women what they can do to keep their perineum intact during birth. You see, we women love our perineum and prefer to keep it intact.
Perineum: /peri·ne·um/ (-ne´um) 1. the pelvic floor and associated structures occupying the pelvic outlet, bounded anteriorly by the pubic symphysis, laterally by the ischial tuberosities, and posteriorly by the coccyx
In common language: the part of the body that might tear or be cut (episiotomy) during the birth of a baby.
Here are my top tips.
During pregnancy:
1) Do your kegels
2) Practice perineal massage (especially first time mothers). Some disagree with this instruction. The cochrane database shows some benefit. Mostly, I think perineal massage helps women become accustomed to the sensation of stretching and perhaps, prepares them to release these muscles during pushing.
3) Eat good food
4) Talk with your care provider about his/her thoughts on the perineum. Listen carefully. If you hear something like “everybody tears” or worse, “I usually cut an episiotomy so you don’t tear” then it might be a good time to find another care provider.
During Birth
1) Choose a position like side-lying or hands/knees. Choose ANY position other than semi-reclining. If someone tries to put your legs in stirrups, kick them in the head.
2) Consider providing your own counterpressure as your baby crowns. Place your hands around your baby’s head or anywhere you feel stinging.
3) Say “no thank-you” to holding your breath and pushing until all the veins in your face pop out. Purple is not your color. Push with your urges. Give yourself time to stretch. No need to blast the baby out.
4) When your baby is crowning, give some little nudges in between contractions. You might ease the baby out without the incredible force of your amazing uterus.
5) Listen closely to your body during this time. If you feel stretching or burning, it is a welcome signal. Your perineum is telling you, “Hey, listen up! We’re gonna do this nice and slow.”
You might also consider a waterbirth with a midwife who keeps her hands out of the water (thereby away from your perineum). You may be more relaxed, intuitive in your movements, and inclined to go slowly.
I particularly love this guide to an intact perineum.
Chime in. What did I leave out? What do you disagree with?
Mood Music
Over the years, I’ve been privy to many birth playlists. Call me a birth music connoisseur.
I realize that birth music is a personal thing. However, I’ve noticed a few common features.
- It is music that makes the mama sway, rock, dance.
- It loosens her body–relaxes her jaw and releases her shoulders.
- It is the same music she would pick for a romantic rendezvous.
- She usually knows all the words (if there are any words).
- And for whatever reason, this guy almost always shows up!
Lately I’m hearing Bon Iver, The Avett Brothers, Sigur Ros, Ray LaMontagne. And Norah Jones, Celine Dion, and Chris Tomlin show up pretty frequently. Many times, the mama picks songs with nostalgia from childhood lullabies to the high school prom.
What was/is on your birth playlist?
Now, my personal pick for the perfect labor song is this one:
How to treat a woman during childbirth
If a woman doesn’t look like a Goddess during birth then someone isn’t treating her right.
–Ina May Gaskin
Last Call for November and January is OPEN
The Mindful Birth class begins on Sunday. Please sign up by Wednesday so I can order your materials. I’m excited about the couples who have signed up (hospital and home birthers, all first time parents-to-be). See you soon!
The next Hypnobabies class begins Jan. 2. Registration opened today. I only have two spaces remaining! Contact me for information on this series.
j_byers (at) bellsouth (dot) net.
Childbirth education is a gift to you and to your baby. Forget spending all that money on new nursery furniture and gear. Save some for preparation! Oh, and a doula. Don’t forget to hire one of those!
Final Blessingway of the Year
This Saturday, Oct. 23, will be our last Blessingway before we break for the holidays. Join us in the community room at Earth Fare at 2pm.
We’ll hear first time mama, Holly, share her homebirth experience. And then our featured guest, licensed midwife Elizabeth Randolph, will discuss “Addicted to your Baby: the role of hormones in birth.”
Babies and children are welcome. This event is dad-friendly. It is usually a bit noisy with babes expressing their needs and wishes so expect an informal group. Blessingways are open to the public and free. Nobody is selling anything. They were created for new and expectant parents but we welcome birth professionals, those thinking about becoming pregnant, or experienced parents.
Hope to see you there!
Mindful Birth
Mindful Birth is a 6 week series that grew organically from the private classes I created for individuals. It is appropriate for women choosing home, birth center, or hospital birth. The defining philosophy behind this series is that attitude and expectation are key to having a positive birth experience. The classes are 2 hours each and meet weekly in Greer. The series breaks down like this:
Class 1: Enjoying a low-risk pregnancy (nutrition, exercise, positive story, meditation)
Class 2: Physiology of normal birth
Class 3: Variations (labor dystocia, prodromal labor, interventions, informed consent)
Class 4: Celebrating your birth (an overview and practice of many coping techniques)
Class 5: Planning for your birthplace (understanding options of chosen birthplace, birth plans, packing a birth bag, creating a homebirth checklist)
Class 6: Comprehensive birth rehearsal and postpartum
This class will begin the 2nd week of November and will meet in the evenings.
I continue to teach Hypnobabies which is enjoying great outcomes. My next series will begin January 2. I have three spots remaining for this class. While I love the student statistics and satisfaction from this class, hypnosis isn’t for everyone. And honestly, Mindful Birth is loads of fun to teach!
Please email me if you’re interested in enrolling–j_byers (at) bellsouth (dot) net.
Non-Chemical Inductions at the Hospital
I attended two hospital inductions last week that did not involve pitocin or pain medication. In fact, they did not involve any medications at all.
First, a disclaimer: this post is not meant to be a full exploration of risks/benefits of inducton methods. Please seek full informed consent before choosing any induction method–whether at home or at your birthplace.
Second, I do not fancy inductions at all. I am, however, quite happy when my clients do not need pitocin or an epidural during the dreaded induction.
Induction #1: This mom was 41 weeks and having her 2nd baby. Dr. Polo Shirt inserted a foley catheter at 9pm. Mom began feeling contractions almost immediately. She used gravity for a few hours to help the cath work and then went to bed. Around 4:30am, she had to concentrate on her contractions. Nurse offered pitocin at 6am and client declined. At 8am, Dr. Polo Shirt removed the cath. Her membranes ruptured on their own at 10:10am. Baby was born at 10:45am.
What is the deal with the foley? This is a urinary catheter. But in this case, it is inserted vaginally. The cervix needs to be dilated enough to admit the cath. Once it is above the cervix, the bulb is inflated. My understanding of the way this process works: the bulb mimics the pressure of the baby’s head. Typically, it falls out when the mom dilates to 4 or 5cm. It is not painful but may feel distracting since there is tubing coming out of the vagina. It is usually taped to the inside of the mom’s thigh. There is a risk that the doctor/midwife will rupture the mom’s membranes. However, for someone who wants to avoid medicine, this might be an alternative to explore. Having seen this work beautifully and gently several times, I’ve become a fan of this method over other induction choices.
Induction #2: This mom was 37 weeks and also having her 2nd baby. She had a medical condition that required her baby come early. Knowing this, she prepared her body through acupuncture, massage, hypnosis, and other easy induction tricks. She was 3cm when admitted in the late afternoon. Her doctor offered pitocin or artificial rupture of membranes. My client chose rupture of membranes. This procedure is painless though contractions may feel stronger without the “cushion” of an intact bag. There are several risks. The most significant is a chance of cord prolapse which would result in an immediate cesarean. After her water was broken, it took some time for labor to kick in. We climbed many, many flights of stairs and I used several doula tricks. She dilated ever so slowly and she was offered pitocin 15 million times. Just before midnight, things became intense. Baby was born around sometime after 3am.
The typical induction is cervadil or cytotec followed by artificial rupture of membranes followed by pitocin (followed by epidural). These non-chemical options don’t always work but can offer other options.
New birth story
Added a new birth story to the website:
Congratulations Elizabeth and Russ!
Inexplicable Ways 