Monthly Archives: February 2012

The Thai Tooth Fairy

Posted on February 22, 2012 by juliebyers

Our six year old, Norah, has an interesting arrangement with the Tooth Fairy.  For each lost tooth, she alternates getting money with getting sparkled. 

I would like to interject that while some of Norah’s friends get paper money, (“the green kind, mama!”) Norah gets the silver kind. 

We expected Norah to lose a tooth in Thailand.  But I wasn’t concerned because it was money time.  Not sparkle time.  I even had a plan to give her a U.S. quarter, Thai baht, and Khmer Riel. 

A few days into our vacation, Norah’s tooth was disgusting.  It was so loose, that when the wind blew, her tooth moved.  And she loved it.  She loved grossing everyone out.  Here she is singing and trying to make her tooth look as Nanny McPhee as possible:

Of course she couldn’t eat much with her tooth hanging loose.  So, she got sick.  And threw up in my cereal bowl at breakfast.  In front of the entire resort.  And since the kitchen staff didn’t speak English, I wasn’t about to hand them a bowl of puke.  I ran to the road and disposed of it in a public trashbin.  Then returned the bowl to the kitchen.  Gross. 

Scott and I sat Norah down and gave her dire threats and warnings if she didn’t pull the tooth.  We may have mentioned feeding tubes.  I mean, as a homeschool lesson.  Education is important. 

Regardless, she FINALLY pulled the tooth.  And happily announced just before bedtime that she had decided to be sparkled instead. 

We’re in a remote beach town community whereabouts in Thailand.  Where am I going to find glitter??

Around 11pm, I ventured into the dark resort dining room to make a press of coffee.  And I look around.  I see Christmas decorations.  I see seashells covered in silver glitter!  Hmmmm.  I rummaged around the dining hall and found a stash of glue and glitter!  What are the chances?  

Then the night security guard busted in to see what I was doing.  I smiled and waved gesturing to the glitter.  He didn’t speak English either.

Strange American.

Back in my room, I covered some of seashells I found earlier that day with glitter as a tooth fairy gift.  Then I carefully painted glue/glitter fairy footprints on Norah’s arms and cheeks.  And sprinkled gold star confetti from the craft stash around her covers and floor.  And certainly, I left a note from the tooth fairy. 

She was thrilled.  All was well.  The tooth was gone, the day was saved.  Her appetite returned.  My cereal bowl was safe.

I’m sorry about the puke story.  I really wanted you to feel how this tooth was affecting our vacation.  While gross, I maintain its relevance.

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Planes, Tuk-tuks, Song Taus, Vans, Shuttles, Mopeds, Taxies, Boats,and KIDS!

Posted on February 16, 2012 by juliebyers

Travel with kids is challenging.  And it is endearing!  Seeing experiences through their eyes is the best!  Here is a summary of travelling to Thailand and Cambodia with my 6 year old and 2 year old. 

Preparation

For a few weeks before take-off, I prepared the girls.  We looked at pictures of the plane and I showed them what their seat would look like.  We practiced buckling up and talked about what take-off would feel like.  We gave them new bags and let them select special toys to pack.  I also prepped them for airport security. 

I stalked travel blogs and processed my fear with anyone who would listen.  Over and over.

I packed my Osprey bag o’ many pockets with everything I could think of:  healthy snacks, homeopathic remedies, changes of clothes, wet wipes, diapers, hand sanitizer, gum, ginger, peppermint oil, small trash bags, neck pillows, a few surprise toys, iPad loaded with WonderPets, trayblecloths, and every trick I could think of. 

Checking my bag one more time.  Can you feel my fear?

 

Security

Departure security was a breeze.  We had to go through once in Atlanta and again in Korea.  The girls were champs.  I was thankful I read ahead of time that kids no longer need to take their shoes off.  I saw some parents dealing with kid shoes when they didn’t have to.  When we left Cambodia, Cedar got a pat down.  She was furious but complied.  The worst security was returning to Atlanta.  After going through customs, we had to go through security again (!! after we landed, grrr).  My foggy brain wasn’t on top of it.  I didn’t realize Norah had a bottled water from the flight.  She got into a screaming match with a TSA agent when her water was taken.  It was ugly.  Meanwhile, I inadvertently took a set of silverware (knife included) from the plane which made it through without notice.  I guess everyone was distracted by my 6 year old screaming. 

When we flew from Bangkok to Phnom Penh, Scott flew back to the US.  I failed to prepare Norah for this separation which happened rather quickly.  So going through passport control and security in Thailand?  Norah was crying and yelling, “I want my daddy.  Don’t take me from my daddy.  Daddy!!  Daddy!!  I don’t want to go with YOU!”  I didn’t think I would make it through with my apparently abducted child.  I was also afraid she was going to bolt when we had to walk through the metal detectors separately. 

The Flights

Except for the flight-we-will-not-speak-of, the flights were smooth.  I wasn’t able to sleep or relax and had to be creative to stay one step ahead of the girls, but I was happy.  The first flight I ever took my children on was 15 hours!  Where is my medal? 

  • I used a babyleg to cover Cedar’s buckle during take-off so she would be less inclined to unbuckle.
  • I removed the girls shoes right away to minimize accidental kicks to the seat in front of us.
  • I asked the flight attendant to disable the “call” button on Cedar’s controls.
  • I filled a prescription of Valium for my sweet husband.
  • I packed kid-friendly headphones for the girls and Scott packed a splitter so they could watch the same screen.

We also packed LIGHT.  No stroller or carseats.  Minimal luggage.  Smallish soft-structured carry-on bags.  I know many parents have to travel with gear.  I don’t think I would have managed that gracefully.   

Korean Air was amazing.  There was always a flight attendant walking around with someone’s baby or toddler.  They tried so hard to convince Cedar to go with them.  She wasn’t falling for it.  They kept the kids on a sugar-high which I wasn’t thrilled about.  Every time they saw a child, they offered candy/brownie/cookie.  An example of the kid’s meal:  corndog, spaghetti, potato chips, yogurt, juice, pudding, candy bar, brownie, bread/butter/jam, and tiny packaged snacks I didn’t recognize.  Even the breakfast meals looked like that.  It was astounding. 

Other brownie points for Korean Air: 

  • They were very much on “crying child patrol.”  If a child was fussy, they must be soothed at all costs.  Which meant, even if the seatbelt sign was on, I was encouraged to hold Cedar.  Children were allowed to break any rule. 
  • The toys they gave the girls were perfect.  Magnadoodles, aquadoodles, colored pencils, crayons, stickers, stencils, coloring books. 
  • There were video games, kids music, good movie choices, cartoons, and read-aloud books. 
  • Soft blanket, pillow, bottled water, slippers, toothbrush/paste, wet wipes, headphones in every seat.
  • Lots and lots of food and drink.

At one point, I thought “Wow, this is started to get really challenging.  We must be almost there.”  That is when I took this picture.  Yep.  Only half-way. 

The final return flight was the best.  Norah sat with my mom on a different row.  Cedar slept 10 of the 14 hours!  Of course, much of that was ON me which meant I didn’t get to move much. 

Jetlag

The time difference was 12 hours.  When we arrived in Thailand, jetlag only affected Cedar.  The first night, she stayed awake crying, “It NOT nighttime.  It NOT.”  In a bleary daze, I decided to give her half a melatonin that I’d brought for us.  She was asleep in 15 minutes.  So I used the melatonin for the first few nights. 

Coming home, the jetlag hit both the girls.  And for almost a week, they woke between midnight-3am asking for breakfast.  Ah well.  I just got up with them, poured cereal, and put a movie on.

They loved every type of transportation we tried.  I worried we would never get them buckled in carseats again! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

P.S. one of the strangest things I saw:  A woman with a newborn in a bucket-style carseat.  The baby was strapped in.  But the woman was carrying the carseat while riding on a moto.  The carseat was sort of dangling from the side.  A man was driving and a toddler was seated between them.  I’m not sure why she bothered with the carseat. 

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Openings

Posted on February 14, 2012 by juliebyers

I have one space remaining for my next Hypnobabies class beginning March 22nd in Greenville. 

I have an unexpected opening for a doula client in April or early May.  I know I’ve turned at least 10 women away for this date range and I’m so sorry!   

I’ve also decided to add another birth in June.   (Contract pending–thanks!)

If you are still searching for a doula to serve you during your birthing time or you’re interested in Hypnobabies, please contact me at j_byers (at) bellsouth (dot) net.

ETA:  All filled!  Thanks for the love!

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Before the good, the worst.

Posted on February 12, 2012 by juliebyers

I’m going to tell you how amazing and better-than-expected flying with my kids was. 

But first.

I need to describe the one flight on which it all fell apart.  The flight on which I was that passenger.   The flight on which everyone saw my breasts.

You read that correctly.

It was the one flight I wasn’t concerned about.  We were leaving Cambodia at midnight on a five hour flight to Korea.  I felt confident the children would sleep.  They were already drifting off during the tuk tuk ride to the airport.  

The seats were three on each side with one aisle down the middle.  Norah was at the window, I had the aisle seat, and Cedar was between us.  Scott had already returned to the US.  My parents were on the flight but seated in a different section. 

Take-off was fine.  The girls drifted to sleep as expected.  I watched “The Help” and had a glass of wine.  A few hours before we were scheduled to land, the lovely folks at Korean Air thought we needed meals.  The girls were curled up in their seats.  Never one to waste food and wanting to be prepared in case the girls woke, I took the food.  It was a bad move.   

Picture it:  three trays down.  loaded with food and beverage.  no wiggle room.

And Cedar is startled awake suddenly screams like her arms are being ripped off.

Good morning, everyone.  Let me introduce myself and my precious toddler.

Cedar is screaming and thrashing and twisting.  She’s slippery when she arches her back and straightens her arms.  Now, I have a emergency preparedness plan for just such an event.  I read it on a travel blog.  Take the child to the bathroom and lock yourself in until the child calms. 

Ok, step one.  Somehow get out from under the food trays.  I stack my tray on top of Norah’s (who is mercifully still sleeping).  I grab Cedar and stand up on my seat.  This perch reassures the other passengers that the child is not being tortured.  I want to make sure everyone can see us clearly.  We stumble into the aisle only to realize we are blocked by the first class curtain on one end and the food cart on the other.  A nervous flight attendant runs to me and asks me to “just wait, miss, until the aisle is open.”  Um, ok.

We wait.  And Cedar continues to scream.  It doesn’t let up.  At all.  I try everything.  Yes, even the rescue remedy.  So I do the one thing I said I wouldn’t do:  I whipped out the boob.  No modesty.  Whipped out.  A phrase I hate and claim breastfeeding moms don’t really do.  I did that.  And you know what?  Even that didn’t work.

Finally, the aisle cleared and I carried/lugged/dragged my thrashing child (trying to keep passengers from getting kicked in the head) to the bathrooms.  Which, don’t you know it, were all occupied.  While we waited, sweet flight attendants showered Cedar with chocolate and candy.  Under normal circumstances, she would have been in heaven.  In her screaming banshee state, it made the crying worse. 

Once in the bathroom, eventual calm descended.  She nursed for a little while with those awful hiccup noises.  I began to pep talk her for the walk back to our seat.  She seemed ready.  I let her open the door.  And we made it three steps before the crying began and we bee-lined back to the bathroom. 

Repeat.

This time, I decided to carry my 29 month old child while breastfeeding down the narrow aisle crowded with recently fed passengers waiting for the bathroom. 

“Why hello there!  Have you seen my breast yet?”  “Did you get a good look at my crying toddler?”  “Yep, that’s my boob there.”  “If I can just squeeze by you?”  “Oops, sorry, didn’t mean to knock you in the head with that.” 

We crawled over and into our seats (the food was still there).  I was terrified to stop nursing the child.  Finally, the uneaten food was removed and we began our descent.  And guess what?  

Norah woke up screaming.  Her ears hurt.  And that made Cedar start crying again.  BOTH.  OF.  THEM.  CRYING.

I was prepared for ears.  But on the previous three (!) flights, there had been no ear complaints so I had to dig for the homeopathic ear tablets and gum.  Norah loves medicine and responds well to placebo.  I told her it was powerful medicine and would work immediately.  She went to sleep within 10 minutes.

And then Cedar went to sleep. 

And because we were flying blessed Korean Air, they did not make me (1) buckle my sleeping children for landing or, (2) cover my boob.  The flight attendant even brought me a hot tea.

In Korea, we headed straight to a playground where (still shaking) I prepared myself mentally to board a 14 hour flight.  I seriously considered calling my friend, Kimmie, who lives in Korea to ask if we could move in with her.

Next up:  how awesome flying with children is!

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Cloth Diapering While Trekking Overseas

Posted on February 8, 2012 by juliebyers

Warning:  this post is more than many of you want to know about cloth diaper travel and my anxieties about it.  Feel free to skim.

I have some vanity issues. Once I’ve “never done” or “only ever” it is incredibly difficult to step out of my corner.  The principle of the thing, you understand.

Cedar had never worn a disposable diaper. Never. Not once. No disposable wipes either. And she’s two. When I realized she was not going to potty-learn before our big trip, I faced a dilemma. Do I attempt to exclusively cloth diaper or do I get over my vain self?

I seriously worried over this question. I didn’t make a decision until two days before we left for Thailand. My husband thought I was ridiculous and he was not excited by the thought of cloth diapers during a 24 hour travel day.

I also felt paralyzed by the choices on the diaper aisle! Sizing, design, print. It had been a long time. It took several trips to the store to work up the nerve to buy something. 

It’s ok. You can make fun of me.

I settled on seventh generation for the big travel days there and back. I tried one on Cedar. She immediately complained that she didn’t like it. It was too hot. 

Also, disposable diapers = once snug clothing falling off.

I put her in a disposable the night before we left and she wore disposables on the 15 hour flight, layover in Korea, 5 hour flight, and overnight in Bangkok.  And not surprisingly, she did not poop until we arrived at our hotel in Bangkok.  She is a die-hard private pooper.  As soon as we checked in (2am local time, 1pm our time), she hid under a cabinet to poop. 

My biggest complaint about the disposables:  when she had gas, the smell seemed to get stuck in there! Oh how it lingered. It also tricked me, and others around me, into thinking she had poop. Have you noticed people get gassy on planes?

The next morning began my hybrid cloth plan. I wasn’t sure what sort of laundry conditions I would face in Thailand. I knew most Asian toilets had a sprayer attachment but I didn’t know if there would be any laundry soap or facilities. I borrowed some gDiaper covers from my friend Erin. They are cloth covers with a waterproof layer inside that snaps out. For whatever reason, they fit Cedar better backwards. So she always wore them that way. Plus, Cedar loved these diapers because I told her they belonged to her little friend, Griffin. She called them “Gwiffin’s diapers.”  And Erin gave me permission to abandon any diapers that were beyond help, if you understand what I mean.  I didn’t have to.  

Here is a cute, trim gDiaper worn backwards:

I stuffed the gDiapers with the amazing Grovia BioSoaker. This disposable insert had sticky tabs so it stayed lined up perfectly with my little mover and shaker.  And oh my word, could it ever soak up!  When we woke up in Bangkok to continue our trip to the coast, she was wearing the cloth/disposable hybrid. Usually, I changed the BioSoaker before it leaked onto the cloth layer. The poop was contained. Yes! I felt wildly successful that the poop did not reach those covers. If I thought the waterproof pouch needed it, I could easily snap it out and rinse it in the sink. A few times, I sat on the porch with a big bowl and hand-washed the covers with the laundry soap we were provided. The sun dried them.  

I could live in a village. 

Did I mention I loved the Grovia BioSoaker? And that it kept all the poop (even Thai food poop) off the covers?

When we arrived in Cambodia, I switched to prefolds with the gDiapers. I knew I could borrow some of Asher’s cloth diapers if I needed extra. My sister had a washing machine and Charlie’s Soap. She only has cold water so I added a bit of bleach to the prefolds. And dried them in the sun. 

Of course, in the heat, it was tough to keep clothes on Asher or Cedar.

(Can you see the bald spot in Asher’s hair from the zhu zhu pet incident?)

Flying back, I skipped the seventh generation and went with the hybrid plan.  Again, no pooping until we were home and she could close (and lock) her bedroom door.

I arrived home with one BioSoaker and 10 disposables to spare.  I ran out of seventh generation wipes in Cambodia and had to buy more wipes there.  If I had to do it all over again, I would skip the disposables and stick with the hybrid/prefold combo. 

Also, changing a toddler’s diaper in an airplane bathroom = not easy.

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Dolphin Bay

Posted on February 4, 2012 by juliebyers

In Thailand, we stayed at The Juniper Tree which is about 3 hours south of Bangkok.  It is located on a quiet stretch of the Gulf of Thailand.  It caters to missionaries and their families; accepting only donations for room/board.  

We stayed in a 3 bedroom cottage.  Outside our front door was a grassy playground and a pool.  The pool was somewhat scary since there was no gate.  But we didn’t lose any kids. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Beyond the pool was an exercise room, a kids activity/video room, dining hall, and then the ocean.  We were served a yummy breakfast with french press coffee, fresh fruit, eggs, and assorted goodies.  Lunch was a Thai meal.  Dinner was western style food.  Ice cream, coffee, and tea was available all day!

Norah made friends within hours of our arrival.  Here she is with her twin from Sweden.  I bet you can’t even tell them apart.

 

Sunday school on the beach:

I loved that it was ok for kids to be kids.  The missionary kids were free-range indeed!  More free-range than I’ve ever witnessed in America.  When they finished eating, they left the table to play while the adults talked.  I wasn’t quite ready to send Norah to the beach by herself but I probably would have gotten there with a little more time around these families. 

We traveled by song tau to Khao Sam Roi Yot National Park.  A song tau is a pick-up truck with benches in the back and a metal covering.  Super cheap and fun transportation.  The girls adored the lack of carseats or seatbelts.  And I witnessed Noelle nurse on a song tau, fishing boat, tuk-tuk, plane, elephant.  Ok, I’m just kidding about the elephant.  We didn’t ride any this trip.

The national park was lovely.  The name translates “mountains of 300 peaks.”  We climbed and climbed, saw monkeys, played in the sea, took a boat ride, got really dirty and sweaty.  Asher and I napped on the beach while Noelle and Zach went caving for an hour.  At least that is what they said they were up to.  We ate food that I thought was a little sketchy.  Oh, and I threw a stick at a dog that was looking at me funny.  Then I had to search around for another stick because he was still looking at me funny.  Lesson:  don’t throw your weapon.  Especially if you’re going to miss. 

In our leisurely moments (which was all the time!), we played.  Scott kayaked in a crappy, beat-up rental.  It cost like a dollar to rent the thing. 

 

And we rented a moped to scoot about when we could escape the kids.  See, if I’d fully vested in that free-range thing, we’d have just left them to their own devices!  We also fell in love with Blue Beach, an outdoor restaurant down the road.  They served the best Thai food with mostly organic ingredients.  And they served alcohol, had wi-fi, and toys/bikes/rabbits/koi pool for the kids.  So we opted out of a few meals at Juniper Tree to splurge on Blue Beach. 

There was one disaster.  Asher got a zhu zhu pet stuck in his hair.  After many tense moments and screaming, he was left with a bald spot.

Thailand Summary:  we lazed around (as much as parents of little ones can), ate lots of food and ice cream, drank gallons of strong coffee, explored a few places, talked and talked and talked.  Norah made lots of friends.  Cedar and Asher played.  We were so spoiled.  The Juniper Tree even did our laundry.  Scott wanted his shirts sent to the laundry just so they would be pressed “for once in my life.” 

I don’t iron.  I don’t.  Don’t judge me.

Next up, either the Thai tooth fairy, or cloth diapering away from home, or traveling with kids.  Not sure which I want to tackle next.   

 

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Hey Guy

Posted on February 4, 2012 by juliebyers

You’ve seen the Hey Girl, Ryan Gosling sites.

My husband created his own comeback.  Hey Guy, Jennifer Connelly.

 

 

 

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Dengue Fever and My First Missed Birth

Posted on February 1, 2012 by juliebyers

Have you missed me?

After an amazing three weeks in Thailand and Cambodia, I returned with a souvenir:  dengue fever. 

I rarely get sick. 

This sick was serious business.  Two trips to Urgent Care, one trip to Infectious Disease, 2 chest x-rays, 12 vials of blood for various tests, two shots of pain meds, 1 round of Cipro, and 1 anti-parasitic med for good measure.  My husband missed work to care for me.  My mother-in-law and mom missed work to care for my girls.  It was a blast. 

The worst part:  I missed a birth.  My first one since I began as a doula six years ago.  I’m ever grateful to Laura Curry for rushing out at 1:30am to care for my client.  But I’m still dealing with this very uncomfortable territory. 

So what was dengue like?  Well, I understand why it is called breakbone fever.  It truly feels like your bones are being pulled apart.  I read that it was also called “dandy fever” because slaves who were forced to keep working when they had dengue, walked like a “dandy.”  I get that, too.  There were times when all I could do was writhe my hips constantly.  It reminded me of the way women rock their hips during birth.  On top of the fever and bone aches, my skin crawled.  Sometimes it felt like ants were biting me.  And I had trouble breathing because of the pain in my chest.  Plus I was a tad panicky since all sorts of bad things *can* happen with dengue.     

At least I wasn’t contagious.  Unless the rogue mosquito that infected me hitched a ride home.

Then, after the worst was past, I spent a week with low-grade fevers and what looked like (on the chest x-ray) pneumonia.  Several breathing spasms landed me with an inhaler.  That really stumped the Infectious Disease doctor since pneumonia is not a typical secondary problem with dengue.  Who knows?  But it seems to be better.  I seem to be better.

Which means, I will be blogging again.  I have several posts planned about my trip so I will detour from birthy/parenting topics for a bit and share some about travel with kids, the tooth fairy in Thailand, human trafficking, and the amazing Slagels. 

Right after I prepare for the class I’m teaching tomorrow night…

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