I’m thrilled to share a new birth story with you! Jenni shared her first birth a couple of years ago. Now her husband is telling the story of their second birth.
Category Archives: Hypnobabies
“Words are, of course, the most powerful drug used by mankind.” –Rudyard Kipling
Recently, I was asked to teach some lovely nursing students about hypnosis for childbirth. I thought it would be an excellent time to slip in some suggestions for using positive language in the birthing room. Regardless of whether a woman is using hypnosis for her birth, she is still in an altered state of consciousness. Words become suggestions when we are in an altered state. In other words, the power of language grows exponentially during our births.
Based on statements I have heard during births, I put together a hand-out for these nurses. Here is a sampling of what I included.
General Language Suggestions
- “You’re safe” instead of “Don’t be scared, you’re not in danger.” When we are in an altered state of consciousness, our brain takes in only the prominent words in a statement. So “you’re not in danger” becomes simply “Danger.” In movies, I hear people saying, “Don’t die on me!” and think “No! Say, live instead!”
- “Your body is wise.” The birthing mother is the expert on this birth. We must never forget this nor should she.
- “Feel your shoulders relax” instead of “Don’t tense your shoulders.” Again. If we speak in negatives, she might hear “tense your shoulders.”
- For IV placement or injections, “I’m going to rub on some cold and then there might be some pressure” instead of “This will feel like a bee sting.” No one likes a bee sting.
- “Breathe your baby down” instead of “You’ll feel burning.”
- “Special considerations” instead of “complications”
- “You’ve dilated so much!” instead of “You’ve only dilated ½ cm.”
- “When babies are in a posterior position, we can try to…” instead of “Your baby is posterior.” (distance the negatives, only personalize positives)
- “You’ll have all the energy you need to birth your baby” instead of “I’m scared you’re going to wear yourself out.” I hear this one all the time as a reason for women to get an epidural. Women release a surge of adrenaline just before they begin pushing. You’ve heard stories of what incredible feats people accomplish under the influence of adrenaline.
- “You look so strong” instead of “You look like you’re in a lot of pain” or “What is your pain scale?” When a perceived expert tells someone they look like they are in pain, then certainly that is going to influence pain.
Do not say:
- “Get mad at your baby.” I cannot tell you how much this one bothers me. I have strong beliefs that regardless of how babies come into the world (cesarean, forceps, on the side of the freeway), they should be welcomed with joy. Why would you tell someone to get mad at your baby? Or get mad at all? Anger and birth don’t mix in my book.
- “This is going to hurt.” Don’t assume what she will feel. Maybe it will/maybe it won’t. But telling her it will hurt is a guarantee that she will expect pain and likely experience it.
- “You’re not allowed/I can’t let you.”
- “I’m going to be your worst enemy” I’ve actually heard a nurse say, “Think of me as the Wicked Witch.”
- Mentioning numbers (dilation, stats, time) unless she specifically asks. During an unmedicated birth, the thinking brain slows way down. Numbers, questions requiring cognitive answers, consent forms, bright lights may keep the thinking brain engaged.
- Telling her what she’ll feel or trying to describe what you think she’s feeling
- Negatives (Don’t tense your jaw)
- Speaking during pressure waves/contractions
- Unnecessary questions. Questions wake up the thinking brain.
When in doubt:
- Be silent. Or murmur how well she is doing. Be frugal with words.
- Give yourself an affirmation such as “I am entering a sacred space and I will use my words and my skills for healing and comfort. These are the gifts I bring.”
What would you add? What language have you heard in the birthing room that hindered rather than enriched.
I have a new birth story available for your reading pleasure. Tori and Eric were such a pleasure to have in my Hypnobabies class. They were nearly giddy about all things related to their birth.
I’m happy to share their birth story here.
You can also catch them in person at July’s Blessingway. They will be sharing their birth story with our community at 2pm on July 27 at Natural Baby. The event is free and open to everyone!
Have you liked me on Facebook yet?? What are you waiting for? Click here and then click “like” to follow my business there. My work is entirely dependent on social media and word of mouth. Help a doula out.
I have another parents-to-be series for Natural Baby coming up in June. Click here to sign up or to share with some expectant couples you know. Six Monday nights to explore parenting and learning to listen to your instincts. Class 1: Learning to understand and soothe your baby. Class 2: Breastfeeding. Class 3: The first six weeks postpartum. Class 4: How babies (and parents) sleep. Class 5: Saving money and creating a mindful gift registry. Class 6: The first year of parenting. If you can’t take an entire series, pick and choose the classes you want for 25.00/couple/class.
Registration is open for July/August Hypnobabies classes meeting Tuesdays beginning July 23rd in Greenville. Email me for information (j_byers @ bellsouth.net).
I only have a few more doula spaces left this year. I have space for 1 client in late June or July, 1 client in October, and 2 clients in November.
Thank you for helping me serve families!
I’ve been teaching Hypnobabies since 2009. Lately, I am frequently asked, “What do I do to prepare for my next Hypnobabies birth?”
Hypnobabies strongly recommends that students repeat the class series when preparing for subsequent births. To prepare for another birth, you want more than just a refresher. You want to prepare as thoroughly for this birth as you did for your first Hypnobabies experience. Moreover, your materials are not designed for self-study. If a couple absolutely prefers to DIY, they should purchase the Home Study Advantage set which was created for self-study.
I have two repeat students registered for my March series. What an encouragement it will be for the other students to have experienced Hypnobabies moms in the class.
In order to make this option possible for my repeat students, I charge only 75.00 to take the series again.
Such a busy month! It isn’t all work-related. I’m also busy socializing my homeschooler. Heh heh.
I have an invitation for YOU to fill up your calendar space with a few choice selections:
“Now What”: a class about the first six weeks postpartum. 20.00/couple/student. Feb. 5.
Greenville Babywearing Meeting: noon. Bring your lunch if you’re on a work break. Feb. 6.
Clemson Babywearing Meeting: new time this month! Free gathering to play and discuss babywearing (or anything else that you fancy). Feb. 7
Spartanburg Babywearing Meeting: Feb. 11 at 11.
“Sleeping Like a Baby“: a class about *yawn* newborn sleep. 20.00/couple/student. Feb. 12
Greenville Cloth Diaper Group: a group for families who plan to or are cloth diapering. Topic and discussion. Free! Taylors Library at 10am. Feb. 13.
Cloth Diaper 101: a free introduction to cloth diapering led by the savvy Jessica. Dads are encouraged to attend. Feb. 16.
Blessingway: I’m so excited about this month’s gathering! Please come to hear Norie’s birth story. This first time mama had a peaceful hospital birth. And the Puppy Nanny will be there to talk about pets and babies. Free! Babies and kids are welcome. Feb. 23
“Having a Baby without Breaking the Bank”: a class about creating a smart and green registry, DIY items, and saving $$. 20.00/couple/student. Feb. 19.
New Member Picnic: I’m hosting this one! A picnic and playtime at Lake Conestee for new members of the Greenville Attachment Parent Meetup Group. Join the AP group to find out more. Expectant moms are welcome. Feb. 19
Organic Nutrition for Pregnancy and Lactation: taught by midwife, Grace Hannon. FREE! Feb. 21
Anderson Babywearing Group: Feb. 25 at 6:30pm.
“Parenting the First Year”: a class about introducing solids, child development, age appropriateness, and more. 20.00/couple/student. Feb. 26
Water Birth and Other Comfort Measures for Labor and Birth: another free workshop taught by midwife, Grace Hannon. Feb. 28.
*Also check the schedules for your closest La Leche League!
Registration is open for my March/April Hypnobabies Class. This series will meet from 6pm-9pm on Tuesdays beginning March 12. Contact me ASAP for information! email@example.com
Oh! And due to a client birthing early, I have a doula space which has opened up for late February or March. I also have space available in May and June. Let me know if you’d like to sit down for a free consult.
The March space is taken! 🙂
I’ve been slack about posting pictures of my Hypnobabies students. I add the pictures to this page but I forget to highlight them here.
Look at these adorable Hypnobabies!
This picture is from a recent class reunion. One baby boy was not able to make it for the photo shoot.
Want some stats?
- 100% of the babies were born without complications
- 100% of the mamas gave birth without medication
- 1 baby was born with a family practice physician at a hospital
- 1 baby was born with midwives at a birth center
- 1 baby was VBAC at home with a family practice physician
- 2 babies were born at home with midwives
- 4 of the babies were born in the water.
- None of the mamas needed sutures
- And THIS childbirth educator was not the least bit surprised by these stats!
Email me about classes beginning Oct. 16 and Jan. 27. ( firstname.lastname@example.org)